Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
