Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize
