the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
