also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Randomize
