Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
