those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Naked. naked and bneed help.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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