she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Randomize
