Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
