After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
