ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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