I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
