I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
