he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Randomize
