and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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