Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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