So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
