is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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