Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
