I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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