Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize