normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Randomize
