she takes plan B like it's going out of style
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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