TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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