At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
