The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
