Don't make out with my wife yet
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
