He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
