Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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