Umm I'm too high to move.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
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