I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize