Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Randomize
