I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
