I'm really into asian looking animals
she woke up with a sticky ear
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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