In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
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