Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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