I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
