the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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