Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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