we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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