Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
