well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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