He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Randomize
