well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
