This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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