I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize
