paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Pants 0. Shit 1.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
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