# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Randomize
