wake up i wanna do it froggy style
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Randomize