Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize