Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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